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- THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part One
-
- Put your "DON'T PANIC!" button on your gown, grab your towel and get
- ready to don those peril sensitive sunglasses because you're about to go
- on one of the strangest adventures from Infocom to date: THE HITCHHIKER'S
- GUIDE TO THE GALAXY!
- You wake up and notice everything is dark...have you gone blind? No,
- just turn on the lights. Oooh, your aching head! You realize you must've
- had just one drink too many at the party last night. Time to get out of
- bed. Stand up, get your gown and put it on. As you do, you notice
- something in your pocket. All this activity isn't helping your hangover
- any, so look in your pocket. Ah, an analgesic! Take the analgesic.
- Feeling better? Good! Now get the screwdriver and the toothbrush. Oh!
- What was that noise? What's that big, yellow bulldozer doing out there?
- Better go outside and find out!
- Go south to your front porch, collect your mail, and south to your
- front yard. The big, yellow bulldozer is heading straight for you! And
- this lunatic is shouting at you to get the hell out of the way! Don't
- Panic! Humanity hasn't gone completely insane, just lie down in front of
- the bulldozer. The driver (who's getting Union Scale wages) doesn't mind
- this minor inconvenience and stops the 'dozer within inches of you!
- As Prosser madly waves his arms about and shouts at you, you see your
- friend, Ford Prefect, hurrying toward you. Now what does he want? Oh,
- he's come to return the towel he borrowed from you. Nope, don't take it.
- As Ford insists on returning the towel, you tell him about your house
- and Prosser's intentions. Ford, who was about ready to leave the Earth
- (which is being demolished to make way for a new Hyperspace Bypass),
- decides, insanely, to take you with him! But seeing that you're not
- about to budge until your house's future has been assured, goes to
- Prosser, gesticulates toward you and the bulldozer, and convinces
- Prosser to take your place in the mud. What a friend! The bulldozer
- driver, in the meantime, sits calmly and dreams of overtime.
- After you've regained your feet, take the towel from Ford and go south
- and west with Ford into the Pub. Buy a cheese sandwich from the barman,
- drink the three beers Ford has given you, and listen as he explains
- what's about to happen to the Earth. Somehow, the situation regarding
- your house keeps creeping back into your mind, and Ford's words make
- little sense to you. All of a sudden, you hear a crashing sound that can
- only be the death throes of your poor house being demolished! Get up and
- go east.
- A small dog comes yapping up to you. It's obvious the poor thing hasn't
- eaten in several days. The humanitarian within you surfaces. Give the
- cheese sandwich to the dog. The poor, ravenous thing is in puppy heaven!
- As it devours the meal you've provided, it completely ignores a
- microscopic space fleet that just happens to be passing by at the
- moment! No time to wonder about this miracle, though. Go north and wait.
- Now look! Overhead, you see huge yellow machinery that amazingly
- resembles monstrously oversized bulldozers! Good God! What's happening?
- Suddenly, gale-force winds blow across the landscape, whipping trees
- around! Ford appears by your side and is fumbling around with a strange
- looking device! The thing your Aunt gave you tumbles away, but the wind
- is blowing so hard you can't get it!
- Ford drops the device and it lands at your feet. He seems to be trying
- to tell you something, but the wind carries his words away! Pick up the
- device and examine it. You see red and green lights and note that it's
- curiously shaped. It appears to be shaped like a hitchhiker's thumb!
- Quickly push the green button and everything goes....
- Dark. You will find yourself spending a lot of time in the dark in this
- game, so get used to the series of events you have to follow in order to
- see where you are. Do "looks" (which takes fewer moves than "waits").
- Each "DARK" sequence takes 4 looks until you regain one of your missing
- senses. When you recover that sense, perform it. If you can see, type
- "SEE". If you can hear, type "LISTEN". If you can smell, type "SMELL".
- If you can feel, type "FEEL". If you can taste, type "TASTE". Right now,
- though, your 4 LOOKS will tell you that you have regained your sense of
- smell.
- Smell the shadowy figure and then look at the figure. Ah, it's Ford and
- you find that the Sub-Etha Signalling Device has landed you a ride on
- one of the Vogon Construction Ships! Ford hands you some peanuts to
- replace the energy you lost during the hitchhiking transfer. Eat the
- peanuts then look around you. What a disgusting place this is! But there
- are a few interesting items here which you will explore as soon as Ford
- decides to take his nap. Before he does, he hands you an odd contraption
- and tells you it's THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY and that it
- contains all sorts of useful information. After Ford nods off, remove
- your gown and hang it on the hook, cover the drain with your towel, get
- Ford's satchel and put it in front of the panel and put your junk mail
- on top of the satchel. I've had you do this correctly so that you can
- get the Babel Fish the first time. You might want to save your game and
- try getting the Babel Fish without putting the junk mail on the satchel,
- just so you can see what happens. Now, examine the dispensing machine
- and consult the Guide about Babel Fish.
- You learn that Babel Fish, when placed firmly in one's ear, are
- universal translating devices! Flip the switch on the glass case that's
- housing the Plotter. Strange words issue forth, but it's all garbled and
- you can't understand one syllable of it! Better get a Babel Fish pretty
- soon! Push the button on the dispensing machine and watch the circus! As
- the Babel Fish comes flying out of the chute, a tiny cleaning robot
- comes skittering across the room. The Babel Fish hits the gown, slides
- down the sleeve and lands on the towel (which is covering the drain).
- The little robot grabs the Babel Fish and goes tearing across the room
- toward its service panel. Just as it gets there, it smacks into Ford's
- satchel and loses its grip on the Babel Fish! The Babel Fish and the
- junk mail go flying up into the air where an upper-half-of-the-room
- cleaning robot is frantically gathering up the junk mail! So intent is
- it upon the mail that the Babel Fish falls and lands in your ear!
- SQUISH! Who said junk mail was useless!
- Now, flip the switch on the glass case again. It will tell you how to
- open the case so that you can get the Sub-Atomic Plotter. Poetry? Ah
- well, worse things could happen. Write down which word of the poetry
- you'll have to type in because it changes from game to game; and if you
- type in the wrong word, you'll blow yourself to teensy little bits! Get
- your robe and the towel. Ford will get his satchel. Put your gown back
- on and put everything you're carrying into the Thing your Aunt gave you
- (yes, it came back...it will ALWAYS come back to you, no matter how many
- times you try to lose it!) and put the Thing in your robe pocket. By
- now, you should be hearing warnings about hitchhikers coming over the
- intercom system. Just wait until the guards come for you.
-
- THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part Two
-
- Eventually, the Vogons will find you and take you to the Vogon Captain,
- who is a cruel cuss! He'll subject you to his poetry, but don't panic!
- Just sit back, relax and enjoy it. Literally! Enjoy the Poetry. So
- gratified is the Captain by your enjoyment, that he decides to read you
- the second verse! Now listen carefully, and when he reads the word the
- glass case told you about, write it down. He appears impressed that
- you've been able to withstand his poetry; and instead of killing you and
- Ford outright, he decides to "space" you! Argh! This is better than
- death? You betcha!
- Pretty soon, you're going to type something in wrong along the way.
- Your typing error has been noted, and sometime soon, you'll get the
- results of your foolish error! It seems that those erroneous words have
- started some sort of space war that has destroyed an entire world! The
- remaining members of that doomed civilization are not happy about it
- either, and they're out gunning for you!
- When you're returned to the hold, type the word from the poetry on the
- keyboard of the case. The case opens and the plotter is yours! Take the
- plotter. (If your load is too heavy, put everything you're carrying into
- the Thing and put the Thing in your pocket.) Ford tries to talk the
- guard into letting you both go free, but the guard will have none of
- that and throws you and Ford into the Airlock. Ford sits pondering your
- respective fates and comes up with an equation about the probability of
- being picked up by another ship in the vicinity. Unfortunately, the odds
- aren't too good and as you and Ford are unceremoniously sucked out into
- space, the Guide bleeps to life and says that you can hyperventilate in
- space for 29 seconds before you explode! Ugh! Just as you reach your 29
- second limit, you're picked up by a passing ship and find yourself in
- the....
- Dark! Talk about miracles! Go through the "LOOK" routine and eventually
- you regain your sense of hearing. LISTEN. You hear a sound to port, but
- as you try to go port, you find that the program is lying to you!
- Instead go south. Aha! You find yourself on the Heart of Gold (HOG)!
- Ignore the brochure, it's not important, and let Ford lead you to the
- Bridge. When you get there, you see two strangers (who begin to look
- familiar). Hmmm, Trillian and that two-headed guy with her were at that
- party last night! They greet Ford and eventually all three of them head
- port, leaving you quite alone. Get the pincers, the Pocket Fluff from
- your gown's pocket, the handbag and put them in the Thing. Drop the
- plotter and the Sub-Etha Signalling Device and go down and aft three
- times.
- As you try to go aft the third time, the program asks you if you really
- want to go in there. Tell it YES. It asks if you're serious! Tell it YES
- again! The program will decide you really didn't mean it and take you
- fore. Go aft twice. The program will ask you if you want to reconsider.
- Tell it NO. Be persistent and eventually, you will be allowed to enter
- the doorway. As if not letting you enter wasn't enough, now the program
- will tell you there's really nothing here to see. Again, it's lying, so
- look two times. Aha! There's a rasp, pliers and a Spare Improbability
- Drive here! Get the rasp and pliers, put them in the Thing, put the
- Thing in your pocket and get the Drive.
- Eventually, you'll meet Marvin, the Paranoid Android. He'll depress the
- heck out of you, but there's nothing you can do about that. He wanders
- in and out, but just ignore him for now. His use will be made known at
- the end of the game.
- Now go fore twice and port to the Galley. Look in the carton, get the
- gun and put the gun in the Thing. Now for some Brownian Motion (consult
- the Guide about this). Touch the pad and the machine whirrs a few
- seconds, then shoots a cup of Alternate Tea Substitute into the chute.
- Take the cup, go starboard and up to the Bridge. Drop the Drive and the
- Cup of Tea Substitute. Let's get this contraption going!
- Put the small plug in the small receptacle and put the long dangly bit
- in the Tea Substitute. You're all set to begin some pretty far-out
- experiences! Since flipping the switch on the Plotter will take you to
- five random scenarios, they will be explained in separate sections of
- this walkthru. You may find yourself visiting one of the scenarios a
- second time, but you won't be able to do anything in them. You're
- automatically taken back to the dark and there's nothing to do but run
- through your "LOOK" routine. So flip the switch and you find yourself in
- the....
-
- THE HITCHHICKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part Three
-
- Dark. Do the "LOOK" routine until you find your sense of hearing then
- LISTEN. It seems you've been returned to the HOG because you hear a
- sound to port. Again, the program's lying, so go aft instead. Hey...this
- isn't the HOG! You see an awl laying here, so get the awl and put it in
- the Thing. Wait a minute...Who are these guys? They seem to be in deep
- conversation. Listen to their conversation. Uh-oh, YOU seem to the be
- the topic of discussion! Seems like that small galaxy you wiped out with
- your careless typing has finally figured out what happened and is
- speeding toward Earth to do likewise! Just as the Vl'hurgs and G'guvunts
- arrive, they spy a huge dog tearing into a cheese sandwich! As the fleet
- gets closer, the dog ignores it and finishes its meal. The obvious
- happiness of the dog is not lost on the aliens and with softened hearts,
- they head toward home, forgiving (and depositing you) along the way. But
- WHERE are you? You seem to have materialized inside your own brain! The
- confusion in here is obvious because no matter where you go, you can't
- get anywhere. Just keep ploughing along (it doesn't matter which way you
- go, all directions are the same) until you find a dark particle.
- Examining it reveals it to be your Common Sense! Take your common sense
- and suddenly you find yourself in the....
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of hearing, then LISTEN and go
- aft twice and up to the Bridge. Make sure that the Awl is safely tucked
- in the Thing. Flip the switch. As you do so, you find yourself in
- the....
-
- THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part Four
-
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of sight then SEE. A bright
- light is shining in your eyes. Look at the light and you find yourself
- looking at an alien sun! But IS it really? Type "WHO AM I" and you see
- that you're no longer Arthur Dent, but Zaphod Beeblebrox, President of
- the Universe! And you also discover that you're sitting in a speedboat
- which is currently heading toward some mighty rough looking rocks!
- Quickly steer the boat toward the spires. Now then, while you're waiting
- to arrive, look under the seat and get the key and the seat cushion
- fluff. Also take the tool box. Now, just wait until you get to
- the...wait a second! Those spires are getting closer and closer and the
- boat doesn't appear to be slowing down any! Just in the nick of time,
- the auto-pilot activates itself and brings you safely to shore! Stand up
- and get out of the boat.
- As you step to the Dais, a wildly cheering crowd greets you! Fools!
- Don't they realize you're not here to dedicated the Heart of Gold, but
- to steal it? Ha! Wait until Trillian shows up and starts the charade. As
- she grabs you around your neck, rifle-brandishing guards rush onto the
- scene! As calmly as you can, tell the guards to drop their rifles.
- Trillian may hiss nasty remarks about your ineptitude in your ear, but
- ignore her. Now then, to complete your plan, tell Trillian to shoot the
- rifles that the guards have dropped! The crowd, deeply impressed, cheers
- wildly! Don't take time to take any bows, though, just head east and you
- find yourself in the....
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of hearing, then head aft
- twice and down. Here you find the tool box, key, and seat cushion fluff.
- Unlock the tool box with the key. Inside you find a magnifying glass and
- a wrench. Put these two tools, the key, and the seat cushion fluff in
- the thing. Go up, fore and up to the Bridge. Flip the switch and you
- find yourself in the....
-
- THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part Five
-
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of smell, then SMELL. Ugh!
- What a repulsive odour that shadow has! Look at the shadow and you
- find yourself face to face with the stupidest creature in the Universe: The
- dreaded Bugblatter Beast of Traal! (Consult the Guide for further
- information about its stupidity.) As it roars toward you, it demands to
- know your name! Tell it that your name is DENT, then beat feet east! No
- time to linger! Get the stones you see here and then put your towel over
- your head. The Beast is so incredibly dense, it believes that if you
- can't see it, it can't see you! While it's trying to remember where you
- are, take this opportunity to add your name to the memorial that has the
- names of all the poor souls who've been unfortunate enough to have been
- invited for dinner by the Beast. After carving your name on the
- memorial, the Beast (still living up to its reputation) looks at the
- memorial; and seeing your name carved there, decides that it must've
- eaten you already and curls up in its lair for a post-dinner snooze!
- Remove your towel from your head and go back west and southwest to the
- Beast's Inner Lair. Reposing here, in eternal rest, is an alien skeleton
- clutching a Nutrimat Interface in its hand! Get the Interface and wait.
- Suddenly you find yourself captured and placed in a cage in a zoo!
- Amazingly, you've been mistaken for the Bugblatter Beast! The nerve!
- Eventually, the zoo's error is duly discovered and you're released.
- Unfortunately, instead of being returned to the HOG, you've been given
- work as a paint scraper! After several months of experience, you are
- allowed to leave your job and take with you the tool of your trade...a
- paint chipper! Suddenly your surroundings shift and you find yourself in
- the....
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of hearing, then LISTEN and go
- aft twice and port to the Galley. Open the Nutrimat panel, remove the
- circuit board and put the Interface in the panel. Close the panel and go
- starboard and up to the bridge. Put the chipper in the Thing, flip the
- switch and you find yourself in the....
-
- THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part Six
-
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of feeling, then FEEL. Odd,
- you seem to have your hand in some sort of liquid. Taste the liquid and
- you take a sip of a nice white wine. It seems you're at a party! "WHO AM
- I" reveals that you're Trillian and this bore by the name of Arthur Dent
- is standing here trying to pick you up. Look at Arthur and you see a
- piece of Jacket Fluff on his lapel. Hmmm, you seem to need another hand,
- so drop the plate and the wine, take the fluff from Arthur's jacket and
- put it in your handbag. Arthur is so moved by your interest in his
- appearance that he becomes even more annoying (if that's possible!).
- To add to your dismay, you see the hostess approaching you! She's been
- known to put people out of their misery with her small talk! Now she's
- insisting that you pick up your plate and glass. Better do so or she'll
- bore you to death! Say, who's THAT handsome fellow? Phil? Well, anyone's
- more interesting than Arthur right now, so close your purse and follow
- Phil. Arthur (the dear man), follows you. Phil, noticing your
- discomfort, takes you by the shoulder, says some unkind words for
- Arthur's benefit, and takes you away from the party. What an interesting
- form of transportation Phil has with him! As he guides you into its
- interior, you find yourself in the....
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of hearing then LISTEN and go
- south and up to the bridge. Open the handbag, get the Jacket Fluff and
- the Tweezers and put both items in the Thing. Drop the handbag and flip
- the switch. As your surroundings change you find yourself in the....
-
- THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part Seven
-
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of sight, then SEE. Through
- your squinting eyes, you can see a bright light. Look at the light and
- you find yourself back on Earth hurrying toward your friend, Arthur's,
- house! Go north. You are amazed to see Arthur prostrate in the mud in
- front of a bulldozer! No time to worry about Arthur and his problems
- right now. You've got to give him back his towel and get the heck out of
- here before the Vogons arrive to demolish the Earth. Open the satchel,
- get the Satchel Fluff, the Towel and the Sub-Etha Signalling Device.
- Close the Satchel and offer the towel to Arthur. As you do so, you
- realize how much you'll miss Arthur and what a complete, uh what's the
- word? IDIOT! Yes, idiot you're being trying to give Arthur his towel at
- this moment of turmoil in his life. With calming words to Arthur, go to
- Prosser and tell Prosser to lie down in the mud in Arthur's place. Some
- softness in your head has made you decide to take Arthur with you! As
- Arthur stands up, go south and west to the Pub. Buy beer and peanuts and
- drink three beers.
- As you're explaining what's going to happen to the Earth, Arthur seems
- wrapped up in his house problems so much that he hardly hears you. And
- when the crash of his house comes wafting through the open doof of the
- Pub, Arthur jumps up and races out the door. Go east. You see Arthur
- stop long enough to feed a cheese sandwich to a small, starving dog,
- then he rushes north. Go north and drop the satchel. Now put the Satchel
- Fluff on top of the satchel. As you stand there watching Arthur bemoan
- the fate of his house, a gale-force wind whips across the landscape and
- the Vogon (true to their famous timing) Construction Ships arrive! As
- you try to reach Arthur's side, the Sub-Etha Signalling Device falls
- from your hand and lands at Arthur's feet! Although you try to tell
- Arthur to push the green signalling button, your words never reach him!
- You watch in fascinated horror as he picks up the device, looks at it
- for a few seconds, then pushes one of its buttons. Everything fades from
- view and you find yourself in the....
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of hearing, then LISTEN and go
- aft and up to the bridge. You see Ford's satchel sitting here and on top
- of it is the Satchel Fluff! Take the satchel, then take the Satchel
- Fluff. Put the Satchel Fluff in the Thing and drop the satchel. Flip the
- switch again and as everything disappears, you find yourself in the....
-
- THE HITCHHICKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
- Part Eight
-
- "LOOK" until you regain your sense of hearing, then LISTEN and go aft
- and port to the Galley. It's time to tidy up all these loose ends and
- bring the HOG successfully and safely to the legendary world of
- Magrathea. After all the travelling you've been doing, your source of
- Brownian Motion has about had it! So let's go back to the Nutrimat and
- get another cup of tea!
- Touch the pad on the Nutrimat. As it whirrs to life, it gets completely
- confused regarding what it is you want and asks Eddie, the ship's
- computer, to lend it a hand. Eddie, in the meantime, has issued a
- warning that he's becoming overloaded with instructions and starts to
- panic! All around you, you hear shouts of anger, fear, hostility! Don't
- wait around for your tea, though! Go starboard and back up to the
- Bridge. When you arrive, you see that the HOG has, indeed, reached
- Magrathea! But the planet's inhabitants aren't to thrilled with this
- supposed invasion. Out the viewing screen, you see hundreds upon
- hundreds of missiles headed toward the HOG! No wonder everyone's
- panicking! Put the large plug in the large receptacle and flip the
- switch! As you watch the viewing screen in horror, you see the missiles
- turn into giant, harmless sperm whales! Ford, Trillian and Zaphod
- congratulate you on your fast thinking and return to their sauna,
- leaving you alone once more. (Whew...that was a CLOSE call!)
- Go down and port back to the Galley. Sitting in the chute is a cup of
- Real Tea! Obviously the previous circuit board didn't know the molecular
- structure of real tea and the new Interface did! Get the real tea. As
- you pick it up, you find you've dropped no tea. Get No Tea. Wow...this
- is truly amazing! Well, no time to wonder about this for long, so go
- starboard and back up to the Bridge. Remove the long dangly bit from the
- tea substitute and drop your real tea. Put the long dangly bit in the
- real tea, drop everything except the Babel Fish and the Thing and flip
- the switch. Strangely, you find yourself in the....
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of touch, then FEEL. Your hand
- seems to be in some sort of liquid. Taste the liquid. UGH! It tastes
- like Whale Juice! My God! You're in the tummy of a giant Sperm Whale!
- Sitting here is a flowerpot. Get the pot, put it in the Thing and keep
- trying to go north until you find yourself back in the....
- Dark. "LOOK" until you regain your sense of hearing, then LISTEN and go
- aft twice and up to the Bridge. By now you should have all four fluffs.
- Plant the fluffs, one at a time, in the pot. Wait until the fluffs start
- to sprout and you see a tiny stem in the pot. (Consult the Guide about
- Fluffs and required growing conditions.) Hmmmm, warmth and moisture?
- That steam coming from port might just do the trick! Go port. In a
- couple of hours, you emerge a changed man with a changed plant! Examine
- the plant and you see it has, indeed, had a fit of furious growth! It
- has also produced a fruit! Take the fruit and eat it.
- In addition to the wonderful flavour of the fruit, you find yourself
- having a dream about Marvin, the broken Hatch Mechanism and Marvin
- asking you to hand him a tool. Remember that tool (it changes from game
- to game). As your dream fades, drop everything except the Babel Fish. If
- you find that you haven't got the tool that the dream told you about,
- Don't Panic! You'll find it in Marvin's Pantry (which is behind the
- Screening Door). If you do have it, though, get the required tool, the
- Real Tea (and pick up your No Tea!), and go up and aft to the Screening
- Door. If you fooled with trying to open this door at the beginning of
- the game, you know that it needs proof of your intelligence before it
- will allow you to open it.
- What better proof than the fact that you're carrying Tea and No Tea at
- the same time!? Open the door. In your encounters with Marvin you have
- felt his waves of depression pouring over you whenever he enters the
- room. Well, right through this door is the absolute soul of his
- depression! Better drink something to calm you before you enter here, so
- drink the Real Tea! Your quest for Real Tea was not wasted. The tea is
- the most calming, wonderful substance you've ever tasted! Go port
- through the door.
- If you didn't have the required tool, you should see it here. Also here
- is Marvin, morose and despondent as usual. Tell Marvin to fix the
- Hatch.
- He'll grumble about nagging humans, but will tell you to meet him in the
- Hatch Mechanism Access in 12 turns. After he leaves (and you're sure you
- have the required tool), go starboard and down. Drop everything you're
- carrying except the Babel Fish and the required tool and go starboard
- again.
- After waiting awhile, Marvin will stalk into the room and look at the
- Mechanism. When he asks you to hand him the tool, do so. In short order,
- he repairs the Hatch Mechanism and leaves. Go port, open the Hatch and
- go down.
- Timidly, you step down the steps. Eddie says something about humans who
- go out into strange environments without any clothing; but Zaphod,
- Trillian and Ford all urge your forward! As you plant your first step on
- the hitherto legendary planet of Magrathea, you wonder what fate awaits
- you! You'll have to wait to find out...in the sequel, perhaps?
-
- end.
-